The Keys to Finding Happiness

Happiness, the word has been drifting through my consciousness a lot lately. I hear it rustling through the empty tree branches on my daily walks. I see it in the birds flying above my head, and I can feel it inside of me, radiating out as bright as the sun shinning down on me.

It’s an ironic word, happiness. So many people chase the thought or idea of it, only to miss the point completely, that it’s already here, right in front of us.

Some think happiness is only some magical illusion, a carrot dangling before our faces, a destination that seems unattainable to reach. What’s wrong is people seek happiness in all the wrong places, usually and most commonly, outside of themselves. They find a temporary solution, in the collection of material goods, in a drink, or in superficial relationships. Anything to fill the internal void. How many times have you caught yourself saying things like:

“If only I made more money, then all my problems would be fixed. This week has been rough and I need to blow off some steam. I need a partner to share my life with, so I won’t be alone.”

The problem is these outside sources are only a temporary fix, an intense flood of bliss, a short-term diversion that distracts from the bigger issue. That’s the dilemma of seeking happiness in the material world, it’ s only a short-lived solution, a consolation prize. The allurement of money continues the destructive cycle of always wanting more and never being happy with what’s at hand. The more we acquire, the more it weighs us down.

We as a society have been dubbed into this fantasy that money buys happiness. Our priorities are out of whack. As humanity continues to measure our worth in monetary figures, the more empty and soulless we become. Buying a brand new outfit, owning 20 pairs of shoes, or purchasing a designer pair of sunglasses won’t change what is already inside of us.

In reality, the consumerism fire burns on, and we’ve been allured and blinded by the false light. The fire burns brighter, taking with it the forests, the plants, pushing out animals and people that have lived harmoniously with the land for years. We can no longer breath the fresh air, we’re literally suffocating from the flames of desire. We’re drowning in our rivers, polluted by the items that weigh us down.

So Where is Happiness?

Abra Khampa, mountain, stones, clouds, snow, dirt, woman, happiness — *_{Happiness is found in the simple moments}*

Easy. It’s already inside of us, engulfing us. Get outside and look around. It’s literally everywhere. Find it in the mountains, at the beach, in the forest. Hear it in quiet moments of solitude when we detach from the “cycle of the daily grind.” It’s found baked into a home-cooked meal shared with friends, each bite tastes like love. Listen for it with your family, when the room is filled with belly laughs that shake the walls. Don’t probe for it, happiness is found in genuine moments. We each hold our own set of keys to happiness.

We already have the kindle in place to set a fire inside us. One that fuels happiness, and radiates out to all who we meet. Each piece of wood is carefully and thoughtfully stacked. Only we can ignite the flame. It can’t be found in outside sources or through others. It will result in the flame being put out, it will dwindle and eventually extinguish.

Last year I was forced to sit in one of the world’s most strictest quarantines.

Due to the quarantine, I spent those first few months completely isolated from people, some days I couldn’t even leave the house. The lessons I learned about myself were invaluable. After 10 years of constant moving, I had to do something I had forgotten how to do, to sit and stay.

In the beginning, I spent those first weeks digging up all that I had pushed away deep inside of my unconsciousness. I analyzed my flaws, mistakes, all the was uncomfortable. Next, something happened that I didn’t expect; I found peace within these faults. I stopped thriving for perfectionism, and rather, I learned to embrace all the imperfections in myself. I fell in love all over with life and myself all over again, even though the outside world seemed to be bleak. With a virus spreading, the media dividing us, and pointless greed controlling us, I grabbed the match and remembered that I am the fire-keeper of my own happiness.

Perception is everything.

me, woman, horses, dirt, grass, trail, Ausangate Trek, Ausangate Mountain, clouds, sky, snow on mountain, red cliffs, Peru Quarantine — *_{Making the most of Quarantine by connecting with nature and myself}*

The weight of the world can be heavy, and it’s easy to get caught up in all that we can’t change. I’ve gotten lost on that path, too. For so long, I’ve wanted to change how we travel and see the world; how we live and spend our money, however, I can only control my own actions, attitude, and behavior.

It’s so simple.

All I have to do is continue to be my most authentic self, and then those actions become contagious. I am living and breathing proof that happiness comes from within. It radiates out in the form of my experiences, with the people I meet along the way, and with the simple way I connect and spend time in nature. It’s emitted when I share an honest and deep conversation with someone. I wear it with the smile on my face and the joy in my eyes.

For years, I buried that person behind the clothes I thought I needed and the alcohol that fueled a misleading self-confidence. I pretended I was happy, but it was as fake as the “American Dream,” I thought I had to chase. I had no passion left, my spark gone, the fire exhumed.

It feels so incredible to finally shed all those things that no longer serve me.

me at Ausangate Trek, mountain, glacier, alpine lake, rocks, woman with backpack, sky, clouds, happiness — *_{Most of my possessions fit into my backpack}*

Each year, I let go of more things, both figuratively and literally speaking. Every time I let go of something material, I can feel the weight of expectations be released and the pure relief of freedom. In a world where I own little, I find happiness in brief moments of time. I’m choosing experiences that will change my life and make me the best version of myself, rather than allowing the system to imprison me.

I can be present with all that is around me. The more I let go of, the more authentic my connections and relationships become. I travel deeper and immerse myself within cultures more. The more time I spend in nature, the more I am in awe of the beauty that surrounds me. Letting go of all the negativity that doesn’t serve me allows me to BE. To be thankful, be open and receptive, but mostly, it allows me to be happy.

So as I still sit here and reflect on all that has happened to me this past year, I have to laugh and say to myself, oh I get it!

I was exactly where I was meant to be.

It was the greatest gift I have ever received, maybe it was a divine intervention, rather than a fortunate coincidence. After Peru, I was soooo close to understanding, but now I finally get it. I came home and spent time in a place I tended to avoid for over 10 years, I was finally able to integrate all the lessons from 10 nomadic years on the road.

Happiness comes from an overflowing amount of self-love.

Once it is attained, it spreads to all we come in contact with. We must take responsibility for our happiness and with COVID changing the world, we must finally sit and face all the gunk we’ve shoved and pushed to the side. Once we wade through it, we are rewarded with serenity. It allows us to live in the moment, fuel happiness, be present. I finally felt so much love for who I was, so confident in who I am, that it didn’t matter where in the world I was. I embodied pure happiness and it must be shared with as many people as possible.

So, I continue to take my daily walks by the Mississippi River.

Mississippi River, trees, snow, grass, bare trees, bluffs, path, clouds, sky — *_{Finding the beauty in daily moments of solitude}*

I am reminded that this beauty has always been here. It is just me now, who sees it with a new appreciation, a better perspective, and fresh eyes. I walk and see the elegance in the unique bluffs that engulf me. I see a beaver swimming carefree in the frigid waters. I hear the eagles squawking in the heavens and I most definitely feel the touch of the cold winter winds on my face. These winds nip at my face and turn it a bright hue of red.

My eyes tear up and at first I think it’s from the blistering winds, but I know it’s much deeper than that. I am buzzing with gratitude. From each breath that fills my lungs, each bird that sings me a sweet song, I am so in tune with it all. With each step forward, I think of all the people who have come into my life, believed-in and encourage me, showed me with kindness, and altered my story. In the future, there will be more people that will come into my life that align with my frequency. I can’t even begin to image what lessons they will add to my journey. The tears are slowly rolling down my cheeks, they are the purest form of happiness I know. How lucky am I to be 36 and realize that I already hold the keys to the treasure-chest of happiness.

What a gift to be a human, to be alive and to experience and feel all these things.

me with Odes, dog, woman, dirt, cave, rocks, winter gear, happiness — *_{Finding happiness in simple moments everyday, like from sloppy dog kisses}*

To be blessed with emotions, the good, the bad, the uncomfortable, we must make peace with all of them to be able to greet happiness with open arms. Forgive yourself, be thankful for past lessons, because living in the past only fuels depression and regret. Worrying about the future won’t alter it. We can only be here in this beautiful, messy, sometimes sloppy, but always exquisite moment. So, look inside and find the kindle and light your own fire.

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